What to do now?

So what do I do now? I'm the runner...I think. Very odd relationship as there was a brief set of beautiful encounters where we met, talked, physically touched( like beyond words, but no lovemaking). Both married, I'm a female with young kids. Dreams then occurring, time alterations when I was with him, extreme homecoming when he first made eye contact with me. Had never heard of any of this. I cried hysterically I felt such a return to myself when he smiled at me. Like thousands of years of problems were solved in a millisecond m. Like " oh yah, he was the thing that was missing". It's all it took. I walked away as he wouldn't commit. It's been life altering. Fifty/fifty so happy I know the answer to my souls questions and so frustrated I can't be near him. Feels like the cruelest joke ever. So, like what now? So need some advice. Not one person I know would get this other than another who gets to experience the highest level of humanity. I feel so lucky to feel this other worldly stuff, yet lots of pain with it, ya know? ...Rather not say but " a female runner"

What if he is willing to commit now? Did you ever express your feelings? ...Observer20

heres my feelings as I am suffering being married as my twin flame is married as well. such a difficult situation and not the best. The psychics all say it is meant to be therefore I shouldn't feel badly for what I feel. This is my current twin flame situation. How do I feel? There are days I feel happy and almost euphorically content. Then there are moments that I realize he’s not with me and I have to share him and my heart stops momentarily in a way that the darkness reminds you that the sky is infinitely filled with uncertainties. I guess answers come when then universe is ready to deliver them. I have been on this emotional roller coaster for 7 months. Moments in these 7 months have been some of the best in my life yet many have broken and shaken me to my core. I have spiritually awakened during this time and feel that I have evolved tremendously as a person. The person I used to be no longer exists and the person I am is one of calmness and one at peace. Well most of the time. It is so difficult trusting in what I think I know is to come and trying to get the one you love to believe in it as well. I realize I can’t be anyone’s strength or salvation. That has to come from within. I can only be the light that adds to their life. It is seriously so difficult to watch the one you love suffer so tremendously and endure such sadness and anxiety day in and day out and not have the courage to realize that there is so much more to life and so many blessings waiting to be received, yet they cant allow their inner strength to guide them to the happiness they know they will get if they just walk the path. I am getting to my end…. The end, where I walk away and move on. I can’t wait for an individual who will never have the strength to seek out what makes them truly happy. I need someone who believes in themselves and their happiness enough to take that risk. I want it to be him. But will it be? Who knows? I just know as time goes on I can’t sit back and just wait…without any indication as to what will happen. I must take a chance that maybe the universe will afford me another opportunity to be happy if not with him, but someone else. I pray it is him. But realistically is it even possible? I am losing faith and starting to realize that maybe what Kate thought maybe is just a fantasy. Maybe the universe doesn’t want me to know maybe it wants me to grow and become a whole spiritual me and then I will get my happy. I want happiness for not only me but for my twin flame even if it is not me. I ill let him go if that is what is meant to happen. Just give me the strength to do it or give me the strength to hold on because he is my future. Just not now. Officially this makes me the runner. The one who leaves. The twin who can’t stay. So this is where I leave you my sweet yin to my yang and my other half of my soul. You come get me ...twinsAHF